10 best ways to say no

Ways to say “No” – 10 ways that will help you refuse firmly and politely

So what are the magical words we can use when we want to say no? Of course, the different ways to say “no” can be used interchangeably, you can combine them or … refuse to give any explanation (as I wrote above). However, as life shows, refusals without explanation can often bring an avalanche of problems on our head. So, it is worth considering the use of the following methods:

1. I need to check my calendar, and I’ll let you know

It’s one of the most important actions we can take. Instead of agreeing right away – I say that I need to look through the list of things I have to do and will return to you if I find the time and I’m able to help. This allows me to cool down, gives me time to gather my thoughts. It’s quite often that a proposal that seems tempting at the first glance, in the long run may lose much of its appeal and become a “ball and chain”.

2. Silence instead of an immediate response

Before I give an answer, when a question comes up, I give myself a few (dozen) seconds to think. Thanks to that, I am able to analyze the arguments as I go along, perhaps I will be able to encourage the other side to elaborate on the subject.

3. No, but…

If I cannot / do not want to agree to something, I give an alternative, a solution that is more convenient for me. Thus, I show to what extent I can help and what I can do. Of course, if I have the time and the inclination to do it.

4. I can’t do that, but X might be interested

I indicate the person / or method that will help solve the problem without my participation. This way, I gain twice – by helping the person and a friend who provides similar services.

5. I don’t mix work and friendship

I do not want to spoil a good friendship with situations that require implementation of projects – rates, corrections in other words customer-entrepreneur relationship. I politely note that I know from experience that when there is money, expectations, corrections, problems involved friendships get spoiled.

6. When I recklessly agreed, I use a formula “I checked my calendar and I can’t do it for you”

It’s a lifeline when I agreed to do something, but after thinking things through, I don’t want to. I politely decline, explaining that I didn’t check the dates correctly.

7. I can do it if you do that…

I can do part of the job if someone puts in as much or more effort and makes my job easier. It helps me see if the other party is ready to cooperate, if they really need help, or if they are just lazy and want to use my skills.

– this way I’m doing things I’m really needed for

8. Okay, I’ll take care of it, but tell me what should I drop

I can’t do two big projects at once. If I am to undertake a new task, please indicate which elements of what I am currently working on should I abandon. This is especially useful when we work for someone. It helps to avoid getting stuck in a billion endless projects.

9. I regret to say no, but my other commitments do not allow me to deal with the matter properly. I wouldn’t be able to prepare it at the appropriate level

I stick to the iron rule – do it right or not at all. I am not able at this point to devote enough time and energy to do it in a satisfactory way. I do not want to make a fuss – it is a matter of respect for all parties involved (I do not want to be thought incompetent by the community and customers).

10. I can do it later … and I can devote a maximum of … hours to it and I’ll take care of this, this and this. If I don’t finish by… I’m going to have to leave

I indicate (calculate) accurately: time, place and extent of duties that I can do when it comes to the task. I emphasize what I will not undertake anything that is beyond that scope. Here, however, you need to be careful, because the other side tends to loosely interpret obligations.